First Friday weigh in

Happy Friday!

I'm thrilled to say that I'm about 97% back to normal and 19 pounds lighter! I was 250 pounds on the first day of my liquid diet and I weighed in this morning at 231. That's about a size already and I even had to move my car seat up an inch.


Oh and just because I post my weight on Fridays doesn't mean I don't peek at the scale during the week...it's a horrible habit and I must stop.

Wednesday I had my one week post-op visit with my amazing surgeon (Dr. McDreamy as he's known around here) who was thrilled with my progress and moved me on to soft foods! Hooray!!

Shelley you might remember these little fiesta dishes which are now the perfect size for me :)
Never in my life has a scrambled egg tasted so good. I ate about half and was absolutely stuffed. Suddenly life is full of options again!! I made 4 oz of chicken salad with greek yogurt and have eaten that for 3 days. Last night was an ounce of pork in the food processor and an ounce of mashed potatoes. It was like Thanksgiving. A couple tablespoons of sweet potato or 3 ounces of cottage cheese is heavenly! I knew I would be limited to a certain amount of food by the nature of the surgery but I never expected the fully satisfied feeling.

Walking has been interesting. I'm not used to moving so slow and I kinda feel like the crazy guy (it's not his fault he's crazy he got hit by a bus) in the neighborhood who just walks around aimlessly jamming out to his iPod. The upside is I see more interesting things in the neighborhood when I'm walking vs running where I'm only focused on trying not to die :) I've helped old ladies, rescued dogs that got loose, criticized many landscape designs and said hi to many random strangers. Today I did 2.5 miles and once we do another 1.5 with the dogs this evening it will be 4 miles. I'm good with that and will keep increasing my distance - especially on the weekend. I also intend to get back in the pool next week to mix it up. I miss my yoga and my trainer but I will be back the minute I'm allowed!

Have a great weekend everyone. I'll be over here putting all kinds of things in the food processor.




Monday mix tape - FAQ edition

How are you feeling?
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Here I am less than a week after my surgery and I feel AWESOME. I owe that to my amazing surgeon and his staff as well as my incredible support system here at home.

I'm back to work (well right after this post anyway). Luckily back to work for me means sitting at my desk vs. sitting on the couch. If I had to go to an office I'm sure I would have at least taken a few more days off.

I've been taking my pain meds only before bed and getting a good 12 hours sleep. Every day I wake up excited because I feel so remarkably better.


What are you doing and when can you exercise?
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Anyone who knows me knows the hardest part of this has been sitting still. I walked the first day home to end of the street which was less than 1/4 mile round trip. Yesterday we made it just over a mile. I will gradually increase my walking distance every day until I can add my other activities back in - probably at the 6 week mark.

I never thought I'd ever have anyone tell me to cut back on my cardio but my surgeon wants me walking at around 130 bpm heart rate along with yoga and weightlifting. Spin will be limited to once a week. When I hit my goal weight (more on that later) I can run and spin and do whatever I want but during this massive weight loss phase, burning fat vs. muscle is key.


What are you eating?
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Right now I'm still on clear liquids. That includes protein shakes. Nothing tastes bad and I'm able to get it all in. No nausea or pain whatsoever. When I'm getting full my nose runs and it feels like I need to burp. I hear horror stories about people not being able to eat anything at all or being nauseous all the time. I can't imagine!

If I can eat a scrambled egg on Wednesday morning before my 1 week follow up I can move on to soft foods. I cannot wait for that egg. Yes, I'm hungry but I think that's natural for someone who hasn't had anything but liquids in 3 weeks.


Any regrets?
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I've had a few "wtf have I done" moments but they were fleeting and mostly during some obscene food commercial. Luckily I'm not laying around watching TV as much anymore! I'll never understand why Superbowl is such a junk food extravaganza!?!?


How much have you lost?
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15 pounds in 3 weeks!

Better every day

My first meal, flowers from fabulous friends and a Bari Bear from my surgeon which totally made my hospital stay!
Hi all. I'm happy to say that recovery is going really well. So well that I had to call the dietician to make sure it was okay that I was drinking a little more than than they thought I would. I still like all my protein shakes, diluted apple juice and popsicles are a total treat. Not a single second of nausea -  my new stomach lets me know I've had enough when it feels like big burp building up.

My incisions are so tiny and they are definitely starting to heal because they are tight and itchy.

I thought this would be so much harder but it's not. What's hard is sitting still and not exercising. I walked to the end of the street yesterday and hope to go a little farther today though it's freezing out. Anything that tenses up my abs is tiring but again getting better every day.

I'm definitely ready for some soft food since this is my 3rd week of liquids. The thought of the egg I can eat on Wednesday makes me able to get through this final week. My sister has made me some homemade miso soup which I'm looking forward to for "dinner" tonight. Not too much longer to go.

Going out for the first time tomorrow for a support group. Crys has so nicely offered to go way out of her way to get me there. This is a great group full extremely successful people and a few athletes. It's wonderful to have so much support from them and I've made a few great friends in the process.

I will be weighing in on Fridays in an attempt to not let the scale rule my life. Today I was excatly the same as I was the day I went into the hospital - 238. That means I'm finally got rid of about 6 pounds of fluid they pumped into me in the hospital. That also means I'm already 12 pounds lighter than the day I first saw the surgeon. My trainer will also be doing my measurements once a month which will hopefully get me through the plateaus.

Thank you so much for all the well wishes! It really helps!!!


Recovering

Just a quick note to say I'm back home and feeling great.

It's been a little weird and I've had some cravings though I'm not hungry.

I'll be on liquids until Wednesday and if I can eat a scrambled egg on the day of my one week follow appointment I can move on to soft foods.

Thanks for all the well wishes!

The post I couldn't wait to write....

It finally happened this morning. Insurance approved me for surgery. Pre-op is tomorrow and surgery is on Tuesday. I'm so excited to finally get this show on the road!

In other news, I've lost TEN pounds and I feel great. I went to spin again yesterday and could really feel a difference in my mobility on the bike. It's easier to get lower and work harder without as much fat getting in the way.  I burned 590 calories and only took in about 800. No wonder I'm losing weight!

My next post will probably be the day before surgery. I'm planning on doing my first video post so stay tuned!!!!





Monday Mix Tape

The wait
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I'm going on day 8 of my liquid diet, so I'm a little zombie-like but managing. Having trouble putting thoughts into words so this is going to be a short one. I survived the weekend by the skin of my teeth!

Still waiting to hear of approval from insurance. It's all in their hands and I freak out every time the phone rings. Today I called to check on things and I almost had a heart attack on hold only to find out it was still in review and would be available Wednesday a the latest. My biggest fear is that they need something else from my GP which would mean an extra week of liquids. That seems very daunting.

The weight
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Now that's the good news. 8 lbs in 7 days. Yes I did think about staying on this diet and losing 100 pounds on liquids without surgery but then I would probably gain 150 pounds once I gave up that craziness.

The weird
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It's hard to explain what it's like knowing you will never have certain things again. I've had the last of the lasts and I'm never again going to start over on Monday. I had a million "last suppers" and here in 2013 at 43 years of age I'm saying goodbye to that destructive cycle. I feel like I'm living the life of someone else right now and it's probably because I am ?!?!

I will keep y'all posted!


Spin-sational!

It finally happened. I had a breakthrough. I love spin.

I've been a little worried about how much I should exercise while on this liquid diet but honestly, I'm not sure what I would do with my free time if I wasn't exercising. I NEED it to stay focused and to stay sane through this. It's a welcome distraction and since I burned 795 calories while eating 800, I can't imagine that wouldn't show up on the scale one of these days!

Today was probably my 5th or 6th class. Spin class at our Y is kind of a cross between a crazy disco dance party and a southern baptist gospel church. It's really fun when you aren't wishing you were dead or wanting to quit and today I finally had fun. The whole time. I usually sit down halfway through the standing "hills" but today I closed my eyes, embraced the music, breathed deeply and conquered them all.

Totally exhilarating. I couldn't get my smoothie made fast enough and I ended up having to have a teaspoon of peanut butter so I wouldn't pass out.

It's going to be really interesting to see how much weight I can lose prior to surgery. The point of the liquid diet is to shrink the liver for easier access to the stomach. I'm going to have a really skinny liver if I keep this up!

To my husband, if you read this, I'm going to kick your ass on the bikes this spring. Be warned!



And so it begins..

Exactly 3 months after I first saw the surgeon - we are 2 weeks away which means liquid diet for me!
Little bit of a panic attack at the surgeons office this morning - my primary care doctor left out an important sentence in her letter so I walked it down to her office and begged and pleaded with them them to fix it in the next day or 2. If we wait too long, I'll have to do an extra week of liquids. Everything else is ready to submit to insurance and it's up to Cigna after that.

I loaded up on supplies. Plenty of protein shakes, gummy vitamins (for grownups) and calcium chews. Because I'm not having the full gastric bypass my vitamin regimen isn't as strict. I did add some Biotin because some people say that it helps with hair loss. (I really don't want to lose my already thin $200 highlights!)


I know myself and I know I'm not going to want to cook much dinner while I'm doing liquids so Sunday was a cooking extravaganza. My husband is not entirely helpless in the kitchen but it's less stressful for me if meals are planned and he's not in there making a big mess (sorry honey it's the truth!) I got 3 pounds of fresh chicken sausage from the farmers market and turned it into several weeks worth of pasta sauce and chili. I also made a giant batch of pea soup for me but that wasn't as appetizing so I left it out of the picture. Every storage container in my house is in use and there's not an ounce of room in the freezer.


My neighbor sent me a message this morning saying "this is the first day of the rest of your life" and it made me so happy - totally started off my adventure on a high note :)















Reality

Things are starting to sink in a little bit around here. I'm experiencing a full range of crazy. Sad, impatient, scared, anxious, sleepless, bitchy, excited, tired, hungry, nauseous, etc. etc.

It started when the dietician/coordinator said the date to me for the first time -  it's not confirmed but it's looking like January 29th. When she said it I had a mini anxiety attack. A tingling from my toes to the top of my head and I thought I was going to faint.

Now I know I'm not going to die on the operating table but we're getting to the point where I'm seeing people for the last time before going in for surgery (like mom) and I'm losing my sh*t. This is completely unexpected. I don't know how I ever thought I should know what to expect since I've never had anything but wisdom teeth surgery (which was horrific and I threw up all over Worlds Nicest Ex Boyfriend - more than once). I had lunch with  mom yesterday and my sister invited her husband (which was fine) but also a guy he works with that didn't know. I kinda freaked out a little and I feel bad for it. But I apologized. (I have a feeling I'm going to have to do a bit of apologizing over the next few weeks).

I can't stop crying today so I texted the amazing Crys who has gone through all of this and of course said all of the right things and I'm going to take her advice as always. She said to allow myself to feel all the feelings and that it's scary and emotional to be so close to something we want so badly. The bad news? "This is just the prologue of crazy. You've got 10 more chapters and the benediction my friend." That was my first laugh of the day. Thank God I've been working with my clients forever and when I burst into tears on the phone they get it!

I already feel better for blogging about it so thanks to everyone for your love, support and prayers. I'm also taking of advantage of this moment to apologize in advance to anyone who has to be around me for the next 2 weeks. I love you all and it's not you it's me!