benched

Just got back from a horribly painful visit to the foot doctor. Physically and emotionally.

I've watched many of my blog buddies suffer so much from pain issues and now it's my turn. It's amazing to me how much living with pain (even in a small area) can affect your whole being.

So after the agonizing cortisone shot in my peroneal tendon he said "there's no way you are walking 60 miles". I left in tears and the whole waiting room probably got a little scared of what goes on back there!

I'm so so so so bummed. I've been preparing for this walk for almost a year.

My plan is to walk a few miles each of the days. He said six but I didn't ask if that was per day or total. The rest of the day I'm hoping I can catch a ride with some crew member friends of mine and just cheer people on.  I've ALMOST raised all my money and it still goes to a GREAT cause but I'm an overachiever and this is a big blow.

If this shot doesn't work it's on to surgery. I'm hoping and praying it works so I can get back to my active lifestyle I miss SO much. I've packed on a few pounds again because I can't do much.

As we were leaving the building, we walked right by the gym at the hospital where my husband works so we stopped and added me to his membership. I'll have access to the pool again and I plan on swimming out my frustrations.

I started this blog the day I first started swimming there. So much has happened since and funnily enough, end up back where I started. Later today I have my first session with "the food guru" as I'm calling her. It's going to be really difficult to get through all of this but I haven't lost my optimism...so at least there's that!

Good advice

This is a very Jack Sh*t shirt.

I'm so happy to know I still have some blog friends still out there after my extended absence. Thanks peeps. You might want to stay tuned because I've met someone, a professional someone (through strangely divine intervention) that I think may be able to help me end my battle with food. I've only spoken to her for an hour but I just feel really optimistic about this. 

The foot is feeling better AND I'm more than halfway to my fundraising goal. Things are lookin' up!

Bad blogger

It's been forever since my last post - mostly because nothing has changed. My foot still hurts and the 3-day is still getting closer! I'm not giving up. I'm just going to have to work a little harder.

The good news is I've not gained any weight but I still feel like a big fat slug. I've done some walking but not nearly what I should be doing. It's amazing how an injury can affect you in so many ways. Mentally and physically!

The ONE THING that has kept me sane (and maintaining) is My Fitness Pal. I'm sure I'm late to the party on this one but it's the easiest way to track calories and exercise that I've ever found. Most importantly, it's free!

Just wanted to update anyone out there that's still reading!

Monday Mix Tape - Shameless self-promotion edition

Hi all! My foot is being extremely slow to heal but at least I'm not in tears anymore. I've been wearing sensible shoes and can hopefully start getting some miles in for the 3-Day.

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Which brings me to the main point of today's post - my fundraising for the 3-Day!

For a limited time, I'm offering some of my mad design skillz - FOR FREE - with a donation to my 3-Day account. Hey, it's even tax deductible! Do you need a business card, mommy card or social media card? Maybe a logo or monogram? Does your Etsy shop or blog need some sprucing up? Well now is your chance....and it's all for a great cause!

Click here for lots more info:If you don't need design you can donate anyway! Even $5 helps!

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Stay tuned for another fundraising post later in the week. I'll be giving away some awesome, hand-made iPad bags to donors!

foot frustration part deux

Just thought I'd do an update to let y'all know that my foot tendonitis came back with a vengeance and it's put me in a bit of a funk.

I got some cortisone shots but haven't been able to move in well over a week. It never ceases to amaze me how quickly pain combined with lack of exercise can turn me into a hot mess.

I'm so cranky and tired. I have no interest in cooking or eating healthy. The small amount of exercise I've been doing has been half-hearted. I just want to eat. Oh and did I mention I'm walking 60 miles is 7 weeks?

I need to get some miles in and I suppose I need to work through the pain a little to get there. I can tell I'm on the mend....it's just really slow and really frustrating!!

Vent over! Carry on :)

Monday mix tape

How did it get to be August already? I've done nothing but work 16 hours a day for the last 7 days in row - including all weekend. I'm trying not to feel sorry for myself but I feel like crap after not exercising AT ALL. My eating hasn't been great but I maintained my loss and right now, that's a victory! I'm reigning it in and scheduling some non-negotiable exercise time this week. Clients can wait an hour. I've got to get some miles in. The 3-day is less than 3 months away!

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Have y'all seen this new Nike campaign?


This message is so incredibly true and I'm so glad to see them putting something out there that real people can relate to. Way to go Nike.

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Because I've been working so much, I have nothing else to report other than the latest version of my software so it's a short mix tape today. Have a great week!!

Monday mix tape

Hi y'all. I had a hugely busy weekend and it went by WAY too fast.

I can't thank you enough for all the encouraging comments on Friday's miraculous weigh in. I feel fabulous and am wearing some clothes I haven't been able to wear in a while.

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Saturday I went to my core class with my trainer then to the headstand workshop. This is an EXPERT level workshop and during the warmup I was afraid I wasn't going to be able to do it but after lots of instruction on how to do it the right way, I was ready to go. And I did it. A few times. Some of them we did against the wall and some we did with a partner. For the partner one (I had my sister thank GOD) She pulled me up from a forward fold and let go. I probably balanced on my head for about 15 seconds without support. Shoulder stand we did on our own in the middle of the room which was REALLY hard.

I did them all without fear and had the time of my life.

I bring this up not to brag but to encourage my readers to keep doing stuff you're afraid of - just try and you might surprise yourself. If you don't try, you'll never know what you can do.

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We had a lot of social obligations which always makes it difficult eat well but I did my best!

Friday night was a date night so I chose a place with a divine salmon salad. Having someone else cook my fish is a luxury! :)

We had dinner out on Saturday before a play and also chose a seafood place where I had shrimp, scallops a spinach salad and asparagus. Oh and 3 beers and a Patron. Yikes. It was damn fun though!

Sunday I had to go to a kids birthday party and watched a whole lotta people eat a whole lotta burgers and hotdogs. I would have normally had one of each plus all the stuff on the side but I'm determined! It also didn't hurt that one of the little hellions had touched all the plates after touching the floor and dog and God knows what else!

I didn't gain any weight this weekend but I probably would have lost if it weren't for the alcohol but I'll always be happy to maintain over a weekend - especially when I had a great time and didn't feel deprived.

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I'm starting my second week of the 17 day diet armed with tons of recipes and a fridge full of healthy food. Mostly salads but I've been making really satisfying huge salads full of protein and other goodies. I also found a 13 calorie, fat free, local greek yogurt ranch dressing at Whole Foods which has pretty much changed my life. Thanks sample lady!

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Have a great week everyone!!

Friday weigh in - Breakthrough!

I have so much to say today I barely know where to begin so I'll start with the best news.

I lost 10 pounds!

It's freaking miraculous. I almost forgot what it felt like to make huge progress - boy did I miss it.

I'm obviously on to something with the 17 day diet. (don't let the name fool you - it's not only for 17 days it goes in 17 day cycles) I hate diets and have been avoiding them for years but I was getting desperate. I feel like this particular plan is well rounded and while it's strict in the beginning, it gradually becomes something that's doable for life. If things get out of control along the way, you just go back and do the first 17 days.

Basically I've eaten nothing but super lean protein - only chicken, turkey, eggs (egg beaters for me) cottage cheese (the pro-biotic kind) and greek yogurt. 2 servings of fruit a day and unlimited veggies. It aint easy but it works. I have completely stuck to it aside from one miniature Reese's cup, one Fiber 1 bar, and one beer. I think it will get easier in the next phase of adding in some good carbs every other day. I miss beans!

The breakthrough hasn't just been about the 10 pounds. I've been doing more soul searching than ever - thanks to a more regular yoga practice. Tuesday night was one of the hardest classes I've ever had - I could tell I hadn't eaten quite enough and my favorite instructor was pushing us with no breaks at all between poses. For every pose of the 90 minutes, I tried to envision what it would be like if there was less fat in the way. For example:

I can almost do this - got about an inch to go before my forehead is actually on my knee


I can almost do this - maybe half an inch until my forehead is on the floor

This one, still can only get one foot though if my instructor hands me my other foot, I can hold the pose.


This one still eludes me. My belly will not allow my foot to cross over my other leg. I just twist instead.
This is what I'm doing tomorrow. If someone were to have told me 2 years ago I would be signing up for a headstand workshop I would have said you were CRAZY.

I feel somehow different about weight loss when I look at it from this point of view (upside down! HA! ) - it feels like I'm being good to myself by making it more about the ability to intensify my practice vs. punishing myself by taking away all the food I love. (can you tell I've been reading Women, Food and God again???)

I'm not expecting this rapid weight loss to continue but I REALLY needed this.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Monday mix tape - Tuesday edition

You'll all be happy to know I've quit whining (and crying) about my 7 pound post-race gain and managed to shave of 5 of those pounds in the past week. I felt like I needed to put myself on a strict plan so I'm following the 17 day diet for the next 17 days. I can do anything for 17 days. It's simply a tool, like any other, to detox from sugar and carbs. My mortal enemy. Today is only the second day and while I feel like have to choke down most protein, I'm doing it and hopefully it will get easier. After that it's an every other day lower/higher calorie rotation which I've responded to well in the past. God I just get so tired of thinking about it all the time. There's not a lot of choices with this plan so it seems to make it a little easier.
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I'm STILL trying to decide how I'm ever going to fit spin into the routine without paying a lot more and switching gyms. Currently I spend $385 a month on my fitness pursuits which seems a little excessive but then again, it's probably cheaper than a quadruple bypass. If only insurance could contribute a little bit to that!
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Today is one of those days where I don't see myself getting home until almost dark so I had to dress and pack for work, a hair appointment and yoga. If I were thinner (and richer) I would have a Lululemon wardrobe so I could look good enough for work AND be ready for yoga without having to wear a dumpy t-shirt and faded yoga pants. It's totally vain to have that as a weight loss goal but whatever works right? I do have the fancy Lululemon gym bag so at least there's that!
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On Saturday I'm attending an inversion workshop with my yoga instructor which involves several types of handstands and headstands. There are no inversions in my usual Bikram class but I've enjoyed them before in other classes so I thought why not! It's always funny to me that I can do them but some of the skinniest girls in class can't. It makes me feel like a kid again though I'm extra cautious to wear a top that stays put when I'm upside down :)
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There's a rare lack of excitement in my life right now but I think that's okay for a while. We have no trips planned (because we need a new roof! FUN!) and no big plans for anything really. It just makes for some boring old blog posts!

How to lose your mind in 5 days

It's easy! All you have to do is:
run a 10k
eat whatever you want for the few days that follow
gain 7 pounds

That's what the scale said this morning. I honestly can't even believe it. All of my efforts for the month of June gone in a few short days. I'm totally devastated.

I feel like I'm running out of options. I've discussed this with my doctor and she's as perplexed as I am.

For now, I'm just going to keep doing what I'm doing and stay off the scale a while. Oh and quit thinking about it because it makes me cry!